Fear of trusting myself (Infrastructure)

What people are struggling with

Doubting your own judgment, instincts, and decisions.

Constantly seeking external guidance, validation, or permission before acting.

Feeling unmoored, with no solid internal compass to navigate choices.

A deep anxiety about making a "wrong" move that proves you can't be trusted.

Why this keeps repeating

Past experiences where your trust in yourself led to pain, failure, or punishment, teaching you it was unsafe.

A core identity narrative that you are flawed, incapable, or "broken" in your decision-making.

The avoidance of self-trust protects you from the full responsibility of your own life, which feels terrifying.

My personal experience

Asking ten people for advice on a simple choice and feeling more confused.

The paralysis before signing a contract or making a commitment, waiting for a "sign" I was right.

Ignoring a gut feeling and regretting it deeply.

Where this lives in the Cosmic Mirror

Infrastructure Layer: Core identity and internal authority.

What actually helped me

Starting with tiny, low-consequence decisions and consciously noting, "I am trusting myself here."

Looking back at past decisions and acknowledging where my instinct was correct, even if the outcome wasn't perfect.

Separating the outcome from the decision. A "bad" outcome doesn't automatically mean the decision was wrong.

Things to try

Make a small, inconsequential choice (e.g., what to eat for lunch) without consulting anyone.

Write down one thing you know to be true about yourself that no one else's opinion can change.

Ask yourself, "What is my body saying?" and give one honest answer.

Common mistakes or traps

Looking for a 100% guarantee of success before trusting yourself, which never exists.

Confusing self-trust with arrogance or inflexibility.

Using this fear as a reason to outsource all your authority, which weakens the muscle further.

Related paths to explore

Second-guessing everything

Seeking external validation

Feeling unworthy